Right before taking the third pregnancy test I called a girlfriend from high school. We hadn’t talked in years, but she was the only person I could think of who recently had a baby. She laughed while saying, “You only need one test to tell you that your life just changed forever.” She was right, but I didn’t believe the first one, the second one made me smile, and I wanted my partner, Jay, to be with me for the third.

I was 26, living in Brooklyn NY, in a tiny apartment with Jay (and two other roommates, because that’s what we could afford). We lived the lives people in their late 20’s lived -- not particularly kid-friendly. However, having been together three years, we had talked about children and decided that in another three years, we would move to Cape Cod, where he grew up, and start growing a family. Only three years turned into three months, since all three pregnancy tests came up positive.

Even though it was a surprise when I found out I was going to be a new mom, I wasn’t shocked to be expecting. I was never the type to mark my calendar; I just knew my period would start at some point. I had a regular visit to my doctor scheduled for February 13^th, but a feeling struck me on January 10^th, and I couldn’t wait. I had this feeling before, but it usually calmed with a test, and then often, tampon purchases the next day. Only this time, I used all three pregnancy tests, and my happiness grew with each positive sign.

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As soon as our families and friends found out my wife and I were expecting two bundles of joy, the planning of baby showers began. Throughout all of the showers (we had four!), we were blessed with various gifts that were great not only for our daughters, but also for the new mom and new dad. 

A few specifically, though, stuck out as ones that would really help me in my newfound fatherhood.

An Awesome Book
Books that help new dads prep for their babies are a great gift idea; the books are useful before the baby arrives, as well as afterwards as a point of reference. When we were waiting for our twins to be born, we were given one in particular that really helped us get ready to have two new little ones in our house.

An Extra Loud Alarm Clock
I got this gift at one of our first showers, and it was supposed to simulate a baby crying in the night. Since I’m such a deep sleeper, I wasn’t sure it would work on me. However, once the alarm went off, I shot right out of bed. This was an extremely beneficial new dad gift during the early weeks and months that the girls were not sleeping through the night.

A Mini Video Camera

We got this gift at a shower, and we used it to chronicle my wife’s pregnancy, as well as our time in the hospital and all of the special moments since. What we love about our specific camera is that it’s small enough to fit in our pockets, and it can be quickly plugged into a computer to upload videos. What’s even better is that, as a new dad, all I want to do is share these great memories with our daughters throughout the years with friends and family, and now, we can do that.

The Gift of Advice
I think this can be said for parents of multiples or singletons: You have to find what works for your family. Regardless of what all the “expert” books say, you have to find a system that is right for your house. Factors like the number of hours worked by the parent(s), available babysitters, and other daily tasks can impact whether or not your baby or babies need to be on a set schedule. Some helpful new dad advice I received from other parents of multiples included feeding both babies at night, even when only one of them woke up originally. In terms of toys and swings and walkers, we didn’t necessarily need two of every item. Instead, we were advised to wait to see if both babies enjoyed the toy before buying two. Practical advice from a been-there-done-that dad is one of the best new dad gifts you can give.

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I loved breastfeeding Isabel, my firstborn, but after several months of doing it around the clock, I was ready for a change. I couldn’t wait to break out those tiny jars of baby food and was excited to see what her reaction would be to the colors, textures, and new flavors. But when it was finally time to take that big developmental step and start solids, I quickly learned that the process would have its ups -- and downs.

Here’s what we experienced along the way to this baby milestone.

Sticky Stuff
When Isabel was starting solid food, her pediatrician suggested that I serve up single-grain cereals. I trotted to the market to load up on rice, barely, and oatmeal, and then mixed a tiny bowl for her first meal. Sadly, this mush must not have tasted very good, as Isabel would have very little of it!

Color Coded
To make things a little easier, the doctor suggested going through each vegetable and fruit by color. Isabel’s next meals were all the same sunset shade -- squash, peaches, sweet potatoes, and carrots. Her diapers were mostly orange! I gave them to her one at a time and waited a few days in between serving new baby food to ensure that she didn’t have an allergy. After the orange group, we moved on to green foods, including peas, green beans, and some avocado that I had mashed up for her. It was clear that with this baby milestone, I was going to need some patience.

Nice and Slow
I learned that if I tried to spoon Isabel’s baby food too fast, she would turn her head away. She only wanted a small amount, as she was developing her tastes. So, I started serving tiny portions of solid food and added more to the dish if she was ready, letting her be the guide.

Bigger Pieces
After she’d mastered purees, we moved on to little bits of soft foods, which made feeding her super easy. I simply cut up what we were having for dinner (stewed chicken, peas, mashed potatoes), and served up a pint-sized plate.

Now that Isabel has conquered this baby milestone and developed into a healthy eater, I can look back on those days of starting solid food with a smile. They may not have always been particularly easy (or tidy), but they were the start of what I hope is a lifetime of wholesome eating habits.

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We had three pregnancy announcements to break the news to our families, and we opted to announce it each time in a fun and different way!

When trying to decide how to tell your parents you’re pregnant, you may feel overwhelmed with all the ways you could surprise them. It was fun to have separate reveals, starting with my dad. At the time, my father lived in California, so we simply video-chatted him and said, “We have something to tell you!” He guessed right away. It was awesome to announce it to him through video chat, because we got to see his expression!

My mother lives about four hours from us, so we asked if she’d like to meet us halfway for dinner. We arrived at the restaurant before she did, and I clued the waitress in on our plan. The waitress rolled my mom’s silverware up in a white onesie instead of a napkin. When my mom arrived, I offered her the ‘best seat’ at the table. We waited on pins and needles for our appetizers to arrive, and when the food came, she unrolled her fork and knife…only to discover the baby outfit!  She was so surprised and shocked that she just held it up, staring at it. Finally, I said, “Mom! I’m pregnant!” and she started to cry, overjoyed at the thought of our new addition to the family.

My in-laws live nearby, so we went over for dinner. My husband brought in his mother’s ‘special gift’ -- a huge (and I do mean HUGE!) box, all wrapped up with pretty paper and bows. My mother-in-law kept saying, “What is this? It’s not a holiday or my birthday!” When she opened it up, a bunch of pink and blue balloons came flying out! Like my mother, she was so surprised that she was rendered speechless. After my husband finally explained the news, she said, “Wait! I have a gift for you, too!” and ran upstairs. She brought down a teddy bear and explained that she’d been saving it for the very day we would make our pregnancy announcement!  

Two years later, the teddy bear is one of Henry’s favorite toys. I love watching him play with it, as it always reminds me of the creative ways we announced our happy news.

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When we found out we were expecting our second child, I began to think of ways we could share the news with our first. Seeking hints on how to break the news to our only child, I decided to read a book about sibling rivalry. It began with an anecdote about a husband who announced to his wife one day that he thought it was time to have a second wife. Being married to you has been so great that having two wives could only be better, right? Just think, he continued, the two of you can go shopping together and share clothes. Doesn’t that sound wonderful? Needless to say, wife number one wasn’t overjoyed with such a prospect.

The author’s message should have been obvious, but the pregnancy hormones had already started doing things to my brain, so I just ignored it. Instead, like many parents, my husband and I assumed our child would simply share our incredible enthusiasm about her impending big sisterhood. That evening at dinner, I said, “Sweetheart, your father and I have some really exciting news. We are going to have a second baby, and that means you are going to be a big sister!”

Imagine our surprise when she responded with a quizzical look and a one word response: “Why?” she asked. As we both scrambled to fill the silence, I had to admit she (and the book) had a point, and I wondered how we were ever going to make this all right.

“You know,” I said, “when the baby arrives, you’ll get to do all kinds of things that he or she won’t be able to do.” “Like what?” she inquired warily. “Like staying up until 8 o’clock and learning to ride a two-wheeler,” I replied, grasping at straws. “And you get to help pick the new baby’s name,” I added for good measure. That last one solicited a big grin, but I never imagined what problems my seemingly brilliant suggestion was going to cause.

Two days later our daughter announced with great pride that she’d picked a name for the baby. “Favorite Towel,” she said about the moniker she used for her treasured Turkish towel, a gift from an eccentric aunt. On the one hand, I was thrilled that she thought enough of the new baby to name it after an item that accompanied her morning, noon, and night.  On the other hand, I was grateful to have seven months to do damage control on that one.

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