When my baby was born, the midwife placed him immediately on my chest. I looked down at my squirming, crying child and waited for my husband to say, "It's a boy!" His announcement wasn't just for show; we had decided to wait to find out our baby's sex until birth.

Waiting was a great decision, but it did add a layer of complexity to picking out a baby name. It seemed so hard to come up with a name when we didn't know the most basic thing about our child. Plus, I have some weird ‘quirks’ about baby names.

I despise unique names, as well as names that are commonly made into nicknames. I also have a rule that baby names should sound great with "Mr. President" (I have high hopes for my kids!).

We eventually picked a girl’s name but couldn’t settle on a boy’s name. Of course, that meant we had a boy!

Our son remained nameless for the first twelve hours of his life. We had a short list of boy names, and prior to birth, we heavily favored Jack. But our baby didn't look like a Jack. Our baby was small and had creamy skin and light hair; I pictured a Jack baby being dark-haired and tough.

So I put out a call on Facebook: "We can't decide what to name the baby! Any ideas?" One friend, Jude, suggested we name him Jude; "Guys named Jude are handsome, smart, and popular!" he joked. My husband looked up from his phone and said, "You know what? I actually really like Jude." I thought it went nicely with our last name, but then, I turned to my son and said, "Hey, Jude..." and promptly nixed the idea for fear he'd never hear the end of the popular Beatles song.

We settled on Henry Boyle. Doesn’t "Henry Boyle, President of the United States" sound nice? His middle name is my husband's name. A year and a half later, my Henry has turned into a spunky, strong fellow that totally could've been a Jack. Although I think Henry suits him quite well, he's the embodiment of everything I thought a Jack would be like.

Oh, well! At least we know what we'll name our next baby if it's a boy!

Photo by Felipe Salgado on Unsplash

The pride and joy I felt at the birth of my daughter, Isabel, was enormous. She was dark-haired and lovely, a wiggly 8 pounds and 9 ounces, with off-the-charts Apgar scores (an assessment of newborn well-being) -- already so brilliant! Yet once we arrived home from the hospital, insecurity replaced these positive feelings on newfound fatherhood.

I wanted to know how to be a good father, but I really had no idea what I was doing. Fortunately, with some trial and error, I was able to take care of my new baby, be of use to my wife, and even become the go-to guy for many tasks.

I was a massage pro when my wife was expecting, rubbing her neck, shoulders, and feet whenever she was achy. So transferring this small talent over to Isabel was the natural next step. Baby massage has been shown to help tots eat and sleep better and reduce stress; it's also an excellent way for new dads to become closer to their babies. I’d give Isabel a massage using baby-safe oil whenever she was fussy, or before bedtime, or just when I wanted to bond with her (which was often!).

After endless breastfeeding sessions, my wife was often too tired to coax a burp or two out of Isabel. I became the "Burp Whisperer," jiggling, patting, and rocking her until the air came up. While I may have been a pro burper, I’m no professional crooner, but Isabel didn’t seem to mind. In fact, I found that when I sang, the vibration of my Adam’s apple on her head helped lull her to sleep. Jazz, top 40 tunes, even songs I made up on the spot seemed to be music to her ears, and singing to her became a nice bedtime ritual for the two of us.

I quickly discovered that changing a baby’s diaper on a high table is pretty scary -- and potentially unsafe. Whether we were at home or out and about, I found it was much easier for me to set up a station on the floor using a diaper pad. If I needed to take my hand off Isabel to wrestle with the wipes or cream, she was secure on the carpet.

One other thing I learned as a new dad: Your baby will grow up fast and you’ll miss these bonding experiences later on. My biggest tip on early fatherhood: Don’t look at baby care as a chore, but instead as something sweet and exciting. You’ll remember these times fondly for years to come.

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I come from a big family -- six kids, all pretty closely spaced together. So when my husband and I decided to have our second child, I knew I wanted a small age gap. This way my kids would grow up together the way my siblings and I had. Family and friends shared that it would be difficult to be taking care of a baby while raising a terrible 2-year-old. However, I found having my terrific two sons close in age to be as beneficial in the short-term as I know it will be in the long run.

I had experienced raising a newborn before -- and not that long ago -- so I felt better prepared with our second child. I remember the first time we -- including ER doctor Dad -- saw blood appear on our first baby, we rushed unnecessarily to urgent care. Nothing -- not medical school, not the baby books -- could prepare us for parenthood the way our first go as parents did.

That’s not to say things were easy -- far from it! The number of diapers we went through on any given day never ceased to amaze us. And the amount of supplies I needed to get out the door doubled -- there was so much to carry; I always looked headed on vacation! While one son was trying out “no” in louder volumes, the other was trying out his new squirming muscles during a change. Having siblings close in age can definitely be a ton of work!

Sharing our time amongst our two boys can be difficult at times. For example, we rain-checked potty-training, so our older son only uses the potty occasionally. But now, whenever he does, nothing beats the look of absolute pride and importance on his face he when we ask him to show his little brother how to do it. We were worried our first son would feel neglected or, worse, replaced. But it turned out -- to our unexpected joy -- that we were replaced. While Daddy was used to getting second chair to mommy, it was big brother now who got hugged first and could do no wrong.

Our grander parenting plans are sometimes put on hold, but I feel our mantra and for other families who have their first and second baby close in age should be “short-term sacrifices lead to long-term benefits.”

Photo by Alexander Dummer on Unsplash

My husband and I had good intentions when we chose to name our firstborn, Caitlin. At that time, no one on this side of the pond had ever heard of it. And even if they had, they were only familiar with the Gaelic spelling. Years later, Caitlin is one of the most popular girl names, with multiple spellings abound. In a crowded room, more than one head will turn at the sound of our daughter's name. Its overnight popularity is proof that name trends come and go, and public opinion changes quickly.

Three kids later, I reflect on the reasoning behind the naming of my three children. Although I suspect it's not much different from any parent's experience, here's what swayed my decisions.  

Does it sound okay? Saying your baby's name out loud is the true test of compatibility. First, middle and last names should flow as one. In my mind, that means shorter first names should be paired with longer last names, and vice versa. Likewise, first names that end in a vowel don't always sound right with a last name that begins with a vowel. These things mattered to us!

How does it look on paper? One day, your baby’s name will show up on a resume, a driver's license, and a diploma. His signature may even be famous. I like a name that stands out in written form.  

Is it too unusual or overly popular? Many people with common names know what it's like to have three other people with the same name in their third-grade class. These are the Megans and the Matthews of the world, and they vow to name their own child something unique. On the other hand, something too unusual could be difficult to pronounce or bring unwanted attention. It helps to strike a balance.

Can a name be different without being weird? Some celebrities are pushing the limits with baby names like North, Cricket, and Breeze. Different may be good, but weird could open your child up to ridicule and attention she'd rather avoid.

Do you want your child to have a nickname? Some names adapt to nicknames more readily than others. We chose Caitlin as our girl’s name, in part, because it rarely gets shortened, and it seemed equally appropriate as both a teenager and a grandmother.   

Do the initials pass the tease test? Make sure the initials don't spell out something undesirable, and don't forget that the first initial of the last name stands out on a monogram.

All things considered, my daughter still likes her name. Granted, she tires of spelling it out when asked, but I'm fairly certain she wouldn't trade it for anything else. And one day, perhaps, it won't be common anymore!

Photo by Minnie Zhou on Unsplash

My first daughter’s birth was both exciting and routine, with a healthy outcome and an experience that was, of course, personal and unique to me. The run up to the big day was by the book: My wife and I attended birthing classes, went on a hospital tour, and packed our overnight bags -- all with a great sense of anticipation. Here’s how it went down:

Missed the due date: Very few new babies actually arrive when predicted, as due dates are simply an educated guess. Also, many firstborns are late. Our first daughter fit the pattern exactly: Her due date was in late July, but she was born on August 3.

Got our steps in: As the extra days wore on, we decided to follow our regular routine, which included socializing with friends and sticking to our workouts. In fact, we took a very long walk the day before my wife went into labor.

Waited -- and waited: The walk must have done the trick: My wife’s water broke the day before our new baby’s delivery, very early in the day. She spent the next few hours relaxing at home, taking a shower, and reading. I manned the frying pan and made her a wholesome breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast.

Headed to the hospital: Once we arrived at the hospital, our time was spent waiting, reading the newspaper, and talking to family members on the phone. Frankly, when you’re a dad-to-be and so excited to meet your new baby, the birth can feel like a rather long process! And just when the labor seemed to be progressing, it slowed down for a time, so my wife was given a drug to speed the process. It worked!

Pushed -- and pushed! Many hours of labor passed before the pushing phase began. My wife struggled, but our baby would not descend. It was soon determined that our new baby was presenting ‘sunny side up’, rather than face down, and would have to do a kind of baby backbend to exit the birth canal.

Changed course: I learned that it’s important to be flexible when it comes to your new baby’s delivery. In our case, the doctors determined that a C-section was necessary, so we made a quick transfer to an operating room. Our daughter arrived in the wee morning hours, kicking, screaming, and weighing in at a rather large (for a girl) 8 pounds and 9 ounces. She had lots of dark hair, chubby cheeks, and was quite healthy. I know it’s a cliché, but I couldn’t have been more proud.

Looking back at our new baby’s delivery, I wouldn’t change a thing. Of course, you don’t really have an option -- your baby will choose to come out when she’s ready. My tip to all new dads: Arrive at the hospital as prepared as possible, and don’t forget the camera to document those first few special moments with your little one!

Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash