I will never, ever forget the first time I changed my daughter Eleni’s diaper.

It stands out so vividly in my mind. Eleni was my first child, and suddenly, all at once, it was she and I in the room. In that moment, it occurred to me: I was solely responsible for the care and well-being of this newborn.

This was a baby milestone moment for me, whereby I was getting acquainted with my new baby, and she with me, and I must figure out what I needed to do for her -- for the rest of her life.

I had a C-section delivery, so as I was busy having these epiphanies, I was also dealing with my own pain and discomfort. Needless to say, as a new mom, I found myself feeling somewhat vulnerable in that moment.

I remember it like it was yesterday. The nurse came into my room and said, “Mrs. Truitt, your baby is here.” They rolled her in, and I struggled to sit up and hold her. She was bright eyed and working me over. We sat there for over 40 minutes, while I breastfed her and spoke to her. There were a lot of kisses, too.

After a while, I thought to myself, ‘she hasn’t cried once.’ I didn’t smell any signs of her having soiled her diaper, and I thought all of this was very strange for a newborn. So I got up and shuffled to the changing table to check.

When I opened her diaper, it was full of that dark, gooey meconium. I remember saying to her, “You dirty girl! You never even screeched to let me know there was anything there!” I didn’t even know all of the ins and outs of how to change a diaper yet, but I gave it my best first try!

At that moment, I realized that she wasn’t going to help her amateur new mom out with cues -- I was going to have to check her diaper to see what treasures she released on a schedule.

I will never forget that moment for as long as I live. Now, five years later, Eleni is still somewhat reserved, and just like that first diaper change, I am kept on my feet, always learning from her, and about her, all the time.

Photo by Ádám Szabó on Unsplash

Before I became a new dad for the first time, I was pretty sure I could avoid getting and using all the extra stuff fathers are supposed to need. I’m not a fancy guy, and I didn’t think I would need or want any fancy things.

Turns out that sometimes, having a baby changes you -- Who knew? Suddenly the guy who could do without the finer things found himself needing, wanting, craving certain baby care items just to make it through the day. It may sound crazy, but the right gear can really be clutch when it comes to soothing a crying baby and yourself! Here are a few things any new dad will find handy.

A manly diaper bag: Believe it or not, yes, these do exist. You’ll want to find something with a few pockets in a solid color. It needs a shoulder strap and could even be sporting a team logo. Diaper bags for dads are the perfect entry into fatherhood.

A book you liked as a kid: Parents end up reading the same books over and over and over again. So why not get that new dad something he’ll enjoy, too.

A swaddle blanket: As a new dad, I was amazed when the nurses at the hospital were able to wrap my baby in the most perfect and soothing way. (The crying stopped immediately!) When I tried, it looked like a train wreck. The perfect swaddle wrap will do all the work for you.

A jogging stroller: I’d love to share my passion for a healthy lifestyle with my baby, so I’m taking him out for jogs with me using our jogging stroller. It’s great for long walks, too, and the smooth moving wheels make it so easy maneuver and travel from Point A to Point B.

A set of comfortable, yet unimportant, T-shirts: Believe it or not, your baby isn’t the

only one who will need many a wardrobe change. Kids spit up. Often. As such, it’s important to have a lot of comfortable tees available to change into when you do (because you will) get spit up on.

A good camera: Though a bit pricey, the ultimate gift really would be a good camera. Fatherhood is amazing, and kids change every week. Having a good camera is an essential tool in documenting that.

New dads (and new moms, too) can use any extra help they can get, so why not lessen their load with a helpful gift? They’ll be sure to thank you for it!

Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash

As a new mom, I obsessed over the contents of my new baby’s diapers. I know it may sound strange, but it really became a high topic of interest! Was it a “healthy poo” or was it too watery? Why was it green -- is that normal? And believe it or not, I wasn’t alone; the color and consistency of infant bowel movements can be rather shocking for any new mom, but I learned that most of the strange colors and consistencies are completely normal.

My new baby’s first poop, called meconium, arrived just after birth. The tar-like, greenish-black substance is perfectly normal— it’s the last bit of food babies take in while in utero—and will last for two to three days.

A breastfed baby will produce lovely shades of yellow, including mustard, greenish-yellow, and brownish-yellow. This stool may appear to have seeds in it, is usually on the runny side, and doesn’t have much of an odor. Prepare yourself for a poop after nearly every feeding!

A formula-fed new baby will fill her diaper with a darker yellow to green-hued poo. This stool won’t be as frequent, arriving about three to four times a day, though it does tend to be more solid and have a stronger smell than a breastfed baby’s poop. Bowel movements for both formula and breastfed babies will decrease in frequency around 4 months to just a couple of times a day.

When my new baby started solids, I found every shade in her diaper. Her bowel movements took on the color of what she recently consumed (sweet potatoes at dinner made for an orange diaper, while peas turned it green, for example). Eating real food also transformed her stool to the browner, firm, stinky kind.

As my baby moved from purees to solid fare, her stool changed as well. I saw actual pieces of undigested food in the poo, like bits of pasta, carrots, and even whole peas!

My new baby’s dirty diapers were not the most appealing sight, but giving them a quick peek before I threw them out helped me know whether her bowel movements were healthy and regular. 

Photo by Katie Smith on Unsplash

When I became a father for the second time, I was more confident, less anxious -- but definitely not any less excited. I love having two boys to play with and think they’re the best buds ever. Having two kids has changed my life, and not only my day-to-day duties, but also my overall wants and needs.

While it would be nice to have two me’s to get twice as much done, here are a few realistic gifts for a dads with two kids or more:

Photos: The first baby tends to be the parental-paparazzi magnet. With two kids, I find myself changing diapers more often than reaching for a camera. And now I’m missing twice the firsts, funny faces, and smiles while away at work. Pictures and videos keep me connected to my boys, and are also something I can hold onto for when the boys grow up -- a gift that keeps giving.

Babysitting time: One of the best gifts I ever received was a weekend from my mother-in-law. She took the boys, and I took my wife camping. With two young boys, life has become all about routine. Breaking that routine and spending quality time with my wife is one of the best gifts a dad can ask for.

If your children are anything like my boys, watching the kids for a weekend is a large commitment. But even just a night or a few hours of babysitting is great. Finding a sitter can be tough. And last minute dinner plans don’t tend to work out for second-time dads. Offering to babysit not only saves us the hassle of finding a sitter, it also reminds us to take some time for ourselves.  

Toys and games for all: It’s always amazing watching the boys play, but even more so with others. Toys and games that we can all play together would be a great gift. With my boys, playing tends to be less about the rules and more about what can you throw, imagine, and build. Soft toys we can throw around the yard, big floor puzzles, and other all-inclusive toys and games would make great gifts for dads who now have two buddies to play with.

Video streaming subscription: Getting two boys to sit still isn’t the easiest task in the world -- especially when there are toy cars to be driven! My wife and I always have a movie or TV show at the ready when we need the boys to be in a calmer state, like when we need to get the laundry done. A little video distraction (and a variety a subscription offers) can help a second-time parent get small tasks done. And it’s nice to watch the shows with our kids sometimes, too!

Any father would be lucky to be gifted with one of these dad-approved ideas, that being said, the best gift of all has been being able to be a dad to my boys!

Like most kids growing up, my thoughts about my father were a combination of admiration and frustration. I looked up to him and his successes as a businessman and father, but of course, had my moments of wishing he’d let me just have my way. It really wasn’t until the day I held my own baby as a new dad that I could truly appreciate my father as a father. Here are the top six things he taught me about fatherhood.

1. Support your wife. Learning how to be a good father means learning how to be a good teammate, with your wife as your team member -- never your opponent. I’ve always believed a baby feeds off his environment and learns early on how people interact with each other. Through his actions, my dad showed me to support your spouse and family emotionally, financially, and physically. They tackled being parents to three kids with the divide-and-conquer method, and no one ever felt overlooked.

2. Always have a camera on-hand. From a funny moment with my siblings to the times I scored a winning soccer goal, I’ve always appreciated being able to look back on all the pictures and memories my dad captured. It’s my history, from my birth to my own daughter’s birth. He loved photography, and I know now he was teaching me about being prepared to capture life’s little fatherhood moments for myself and for my family.

3. Be proud of the big and little things. My dad turned everything into a big accomplishment and celebrated every moment as if I had won the Nobel Prize. Getting good grades deserved an ice cream sundae; making the school safety

patrol deserved a movie; scoring a soccer goal deserved a fun family outing. Simply turning a year older was always reason enough for a big party.

4. Cherish each day. It sounds cliché, but when it comes to being a new dad, you can’t take any moment for granted. Aside from planning fun family activities, my dad found a way to make even the most mundane errands and chores a fun outing: Driving to the grocery store turned into a dance party and sing-along in the car, and shopping turned into a hide-and-seek game.

5. Provide for your family. Kids come with expenses, to say the least, but also come with emotional needs that need to be met every day. My dad did everything he could to provide for us financially, emotionally, and physically. If he worked overtime and didn’t see us, he would leave us sweet notes saying how much he loved and missed us.

6. Help them learn, let them grow. Teach your child life’s lessons, decision-making and problem-solving skills to grow their independence. Sometimes, as much as you may want to just do things for them to make it easy, it’s important to let your child learn by doing. Let them get frustrated when learning to crawl, so it pushes them to try harder. Instead of cleaning up my 1-year-old daughter’s toys myself, I have her help me, so she can learn.

Learning how to be a good father takes practice and patience -- and at the end of the day, I am happy to know I have my own dad to turn to throughout my fatherhood triumphs and missteps.

Photo by Sebastián León Prado on Unsplash